Rocky: I'm sure all my fellow felines have experienced how politically incorrect our humans are when they speak to us. Therefore, I have compiled the following list of 13 proper, politically correct terms we can use to educate them when they insult us:1) We do not "yak hairballs" ... we are Rug Redecorators.
2) We do not "scratch" ... we are Skin Regenerators.
3) We are not "shedding machines" ... we are Hair Relocation Stylists.
4) We are not "ruthless hunters" ... we are Wildlife Control Agents.
5) Do not call us "dope addicts" ... we are Catnip Connoisseurs.
6) We do not "break things" ... we are Gravity Implementors.
7) Do not call us "bed hogs" ... we are Mattress Assessors.
8) We are not "yowlers" ... we are Advisors.
9) Do not call us a "lap fungus" ... we are Sleep Study Experts.
10) We are not "evil" ... we are Badness Enhanced.
11) We are not "fat" ... we are Mass Enhanced.
12) We are not "lazy" ... we are Motivationally Challenged.
13) And we are never "underfoot" ... we are Treat GPS Systems.
Reading this is probably the best thing that will happen to the Woman all day. Thanks for the great laugh!
ReplyDeleteChase
Brilliant.
ReplyDeleteHa! My favorite is "Hair Relocation Stylists."
ReplyDeleteMwahahahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteWe want to thank you for working so hard on your part in CCSI III. You have gone way above and beyond the call of duty making your part be the best is can be. Big weekend coming up with the premier showing of CCSI III. Great working with you.
ReplyDeleteSassy, Momo, Karl, Ruis, Opus & Roscoe
Yes I think this time of year, everyone is a very prolific Hair Relocation Stylist.
ReplyDeleteTiki is an expert skin regenrator, and Mom says she wouldn't know what to do without having hair relocation stylists around everyday. This is a great list.
ReplyDeleteTiki, Tavi, Cody and Camie
Hey, it's about time someone told my mom da correct terms! She also needs to stop calling us "nut jobs"...
ReplyDeleteAye to your list, Rocky!
ReplyDelete3/ Also Fur Collage Artists!
ReplyDeleteI FINALLY did the book meme yesterday!
~Jack
What a great list!!!!
ReplyDeleteExcellent! I was just, for instance, assessing "my" mattress this very morning. :)
ReplyDeleteThat's just hilarious! Good thing we have cats to teach us how to act right, eh? :)
ReplyDeleteArh...we weawwy need to educate the world!
ReplyDeleteThis was a very useful and educational post. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteI like all of those - bet SS can use some too!
ReplyDeleteThose are great, Rocky, but no matter what, Bonnie is still Underfoot.
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