Sunday Penance

Rocky: Just because I've spent the week biting my human's arm off and jumping on my catministrative assistant Callie to make her screeeeech, my human is making me do Sunday penance. She's interrupting my shoestring tying session to make me listen to the Twelve Cat Commandments from Planet Cat ... 1) Thou shalt not jump onto the keyboard when thy human is at the computer.

2) Thou shalt not sit in front of the television or computer monitor, as thou art not transparent.

3) Thou shalt not projectile vomit from the top of the refrigerator.

4) Thou shalt not walk in on a dinner party and commence licking thy butt.

5) Thou shalt not lie down with thy butt in thy human's face.

6) Fast as thou art, thou canst not run through closed doors.

7) Thou shalt not jump onto the toilet seat just as thy human is sitting down.

8) Thou shalt not unroll all the toilet paper off the roll.

9) Thou shalt not jump onto thy sleeping human's bladder at 4 a.m.

10) Thou shalt realize that thy house is not a prison from which to escape at any opportunity.

11) Thou shalt not trip thy human even if said human walkest too slow.

12) Thou shalt show remorse when being scolded.

Whatever.