Saturday, June 23, 2007

Close Encounters of the Kitty Kind

Rocky here. As everyone knows, I was rescued from the woods when I was only one day old, so my ancestry is a mystery. Well, no longer -- the secret of my heritage has been solved!

Every morning, my human artist takes a long walk around our city's 177-acre Deming Park (something to do with her not wanting her belly to look like mine.) Well, this morning she made a momentous discovery in the park that finally reveals my true origins ... and, my human says, explains much of my behavior. Please know that many obstacles were deliberately put in the park to deter anyone from making this important discovery .... gardens and swimming pools and playgrounds, and scenic distractions such as these:
But as you know, my human is an artist and, therefore, does not follow the beaten path. She seeks out the hidden trails through the woods, such as this one:
Some mysterious force drew her into this dark path, so she ignored the warning sign (put there by Cats in Black, as you will soon discover) and proceeded down the forbidding road:
Then, deep into the woods, she noticed something strange at the side of the path ....
Intrigued, she stepped closer to the odd, disk-shaped object ....
Noticing that its dome was the perfect size to carry a cat on a long journey, she stepped even closer to investigate ....
Suddenly a thought burst into her mind, as if implanted there by forces outside herself ... "A UFO: Unidentified Feline Object! Rocky!!! All those times I've called you a 'weird little alien' ... I think I was exactly right!!"

She came home and related this revelation to me, and when I tried to deny that I was an alien, she presented me with this indisputable proof:









Yes, it's true. The time has come for me declassify this top-secret information and confess that I, Rocky, am in truth a superior CatBeing, transported to Earth from the farthest reaches of the galaxy. I boldly came from where no cat has come before, to explore new worlds and select a suitable one upon which to set up my e-commerce business ... and to bring as many EarthCats as possible into my human's home to assist me.

But please have no fear -- I come in peace. I have no desire for world domination. I have a simpler mission: manage a few humans, run a successful company, live long and prosper, and retire with a nice golden parachute -- full of nip!

13 comments:

Karen Jo said...

Now that is the coolest origin story I have ever read. You look really alien in your picture.

Parker said...

Rocky, I am glad you came to earth, we are a better planet for it!

Monty Q. Kat said...

Heh-that's pawsome! Looks like the secret it out now!

Caesar and Princess said...

What an exciting revelation. Your artist human is pretty intelligent to make the discovery... and this makes perfect the reason that you were found by her!

happy day Rocky

Cheysuli said...

I knew you were far from ordinary... however I didn't know how far!

Daisy said...

What an exciting discovery! I never knew a real live alien before. Take me to your leader!

ps: You do not have any cookbooks entitled "To Serve Man" do you?

Kaze, Latte, or Chase said...

Wow, what an incredible discovery! The Lap Lady likes to go down roads she's not supposed to as well. She says that's where the best stuff is!

Kaze

Deven said...

I'm delighted they decided to leave you on this particular planet and that there are so many of your forebears and your progeny about.

That means we ALL can have wonderful aliens like yourself to play with and love to pieces, as believe me, we do.

Grr, Midnight & Cocoa said...

oooh - how 'citing! duz yur UFO got sparkly lights an stuff? kin we see inside? or is it top seecrit?

Angus said...

Verra interesting, Rocky! We like aliens at our house, too, and wonder if you like it better here or on your home planet?

Victor Tabbycat said...

Shhhhhhh! You wasn't aposed to tell anyone yet! Yu'll spoil the whole fing!

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