Tail-less Tuxie & CEO Toes Tuesday

Before Rocky takes over the blog again, LittleGirl and I are posting a picture of us basking in sun in the upstairs human litter box room. That's me, Oscar, on the left, staring at LittleGirl's tail, wondering how she maneuvers with that thing dragging behind her ... because I don't have one.

Rocky here. Every time I try to take a quick snooze, some insubordinate staff member messes with my blog and wakes me up with all that keyboard pawing! You two give me that mouse and get back to work!

Press Conference: Libby Trial Verdict

My fellow citizens, as your self-appointed Cat-in-Chief, I have called this press conference to respond to today's guilty verdict in the Scooter Libby trial, which does not bode well for his boss, Dick Cheney. Libby was implicated in leaking to the press Valerie Plame's identity as a CIA agent, and now Cheney may be in deep dog doo.

First, let me make it clear that was not Cheney behind me at my State of the CatUnion address. That was a manipulated photo, which I was not involved in, was totally unaware of and did not cover up. An unnamed staffer inserted a Cheney image behind the actual photo of me at the podium.

Second, I have never met Dick Cheney and he is no friend of mine. Of course, that depends on what the definition of 'is' is. But let me assure you that I have never had feline relations with that man! I have never spoken with him, doctored intelligence with him, gone war-profiteering with him, and I certainly have never gone hunting with him.

Third, I have no association with Scooter Libby. Although there are rumors that Libby may be a scapegoat, with a name like 'Scooter," he is obviously a not a goat but a dog, and I do not associate with dogs. Cheney may be going to the dogs, as well; rumors of his impoochment are rabidly circulating.

As you know, this whole sordid affair began with the claim that Iraq tried to purchase yellowcake uranium from Africa. Actionable intelligence from my own FBI (Feline Bureau of Investigation) has proven that it was not yellowcake but a big yellowcat hairball produced by African lions, which Saddam's government officials hoped to hide behind when the coalition of the willing invaded Baghdad.

In closing, you have my assurance that anyone found leaking in my catministration will be promptly fired and confined to a top-security litterpan for the rest of their natural nine lives, where they can cover up all they want. And to anyone who says I had anything to do with this mess, I say bring 'em on! As I've said many times, fool me once, shame on ... shame on you fooler; fool me again, no matter how foolish feeling like you can fool me, you fool, fooling me twice or thrice times fooled you can't never get fooled on no more.

No, I will not take questions. It is my policy to not comment on ongoing investigations, even after they're not ongoing. Direct your questions to:

Dick Cheney
One Undisclosed Location
Somewhere, USA

Bookmark Benefit for Mu Shue

ArtsyCatsy is worried about our new friend Mu Shue. As you may know, he’s very sick and needs treatment that will cost his Mama Laura $1200. She has already spent her savings helping him, and even had to sell the heirloom jewelry her grandmother left her.

With 15 of us kitties, our humans have been in the same situation, and our hearts go out to Mu Shue and Mama Laura. We ArtsyCats are very impressed by how this wonderful world of blogging kitties pulls together to help each other out, and we want to do our part. So we met for a brainpurring session and had an IDEA! The human artists are making hand-beaded waxed linen bookmarks to offer for $10 each on our blog and we'll send ALL the proceeds to Mu Shue and Mama Laura.

To order bookmarks to help Mu Shue, just email ArtsyCatsy@yahoo.com with your mailing address, the number of bookmarks you want to order, and whether you want to use PayPal or mail a check, and we’ll email instructions right back to you. (When you order, you can add a dollar or two to help cover mailing costs if you want, but you don’t have to. And, yes, we will ship internationally.)

We'll make as many bookmarks as we can from now through Feb. 22, and then we’ll send ALL the money to Mu Shue and Mama Laura. Just think – if we could sell 60 bookmarks, that would completely cover the $600 down payment for Mu Shue’s treatment! And don’t forget, if you don’t need a bookmark, the wonderful Mr. Hendrix is also helping to collect donations for Mu Shue.

Our heartfelt thanks to all you kind and caring cats and beans for helping Mu Shue and Mama Laura. We’re very proud to be a part of this beautiful kitty community!

NOTE: Your bookmark may not be exactly like the ones you see here (and please excuse our quick photography) because we’re hurrying to help Mu Shue so we're using jewelry supplies already on hand. But each one-of-a-kind bookmark will have a kitty charm, and we promise you’ll love it!