Tree Woes Wednesday

Here I go again, forced to take matters into my own paws, and drag out my tree trimming equipment and go rent a bucket truck! We had a thunderstorm yesterday, and it disproved the old axiom that "lightning never strikes twice in the same place."

Several years ago, lightning struck the ginormous catalpa tree in our backyard, and half the tree has been dying ever since. Well, yesterday, lightning struck it again!! It sounded like a bomb hit our house, and our telephone service is still fried!

I went outside to check it out, and besides an explosion of bark all over our yard, this is what I found:
That dark streak down the middle of the trunk is where lightning struck the first time. The lighter streaks on the sides and the stripped bark is where lightning struck yesterday. The streak goes from the top of the tree to the ground, and this tree is at least 5 stories high!

The doofus humans should've had this tree fixed years ago! Now they have no choice, because it's going to fall down and crush Artsy Catsy! Look how it towers over our two-story house and all the power lines:
No doubt it would take out our neighbor's house, too, and probably half the neighborhood: Well, the humans have been on the phone all day, calling tree services, calling arborists to see if the tree can be saved, calling insurance companies, calling, calling, calling. I say, JUST DO IT! More storms are coming even as I type, so I'm going out there to topple the thing myself -- before I end up with a tree trunk up my tuchas while I'm trying to nap!! I mean, a CAT can handle a CATalpa, right?