For this Thursday Thirteen, I've been thoroughly thumbing through my thesaurus and dictionary. You see, I think it's very important for a cat -- especially we executive mancats -- to be literate, to use appropriate cat words and to understand their meanings ... lest we appear to be thick-headed, unthinking third-rate thugs, thrashing around in the throes of thunderstruck illiteracy!
Therefore, I would like to share with you Thirteen Cat Words from my voluminous vocatulary:
1) Catcall: A signaling device we use to give marching orders to humans to fill food bowls, open doors, give us chin scritches and their undivided attention.
2) Catty-corner: The proper location for our litter box.
3) Caterwaul: What we sometimes hit when we miss the litter box.
4) Catwalk: Our daily exercise regimen, consisting of short shuffles to the food bowl with occasional detours to the catty-corner.
5) Catkin: What happens to kitties who didn't have hoohaectomies or ladygardenectomies.
6) Catalyst: What humans use to do our shopping, i.e. 1. Stinky goodness 2. Temptations 3. Litter 4. Toys 5. More Temptations
7) Catacomb: A device used on kitty spa days to remove cat-a-mats from our furs.
8) Catapult: What we do when the catacomb gets caught in a cat-a-mat.
9) Catnip: What we do when you "pult" too hard with the catacomb.
10) Catgut: An essential part of our insides, which requires constant filling with stinky goodness and Temptations.
11) Catsup: Mealtime; a method for filling the catgut.
12) Catnap: What we do when we're not catsupping.
13) Category: The yucky stuff we yak up all over the house when we've catsupped too much.
(Creative assistance provided by Planet Cat: a cat-alog)
